Thailand’s North East corner

30 September 2012

September 14th – 30th

We still had things to see in Bangkok, Julie and I, with or without Claire. Most important was the “Grand Palace” which is right in the center of town. Right we thought, get on the subway, get off, turn right and walk straight for six blocks.

Only, we talked and talked and talked some more, and usually when you talk and walk at the same time, well you don’t get to your destination…
We did manage to get in, just before the doors closed, and got an hour to visit this magnificent palace. Imagine a palace, with all the beautiful things you find in a palace, now paint it gold. That’s how the Grand Palace is. Golden. Amazing.

We spent the next day in the market in Bang Lam Phu, a little village within the city, with handicraft, coffee shops, restaurants and best of all, fish massage. Take your shoes off, wash your feet quickly and dip them, knee deep, in a fish tank. Thousands of small fish, one to three inches, will come in and eat your dead skins, dirt, broken nails, hair, and all the microscopic things they love to eat. It tickles at first, especially between the toes, but once you relax and close your eyes, it’s just about the best foot massage you ever got.

One last temple and we were off to Kanchanaburi. It’s a small village North West of Bangkok, famous for its “Bridge Over The Kwai River”. The floating guesthouse was a treat in itself but crossing the bridge under torrential rain, while the fog from the river engulfed it all, that was something. Just like the movie. Minus the bombs.
We kept our route North East towards Lopburi, camped by a lake (under yet more monsoon rain) and reached our destination on the 17th. Lopburi is a small town, famous only for the hundreds of monkeys running wild in the city, mostly around the old Khmer ruins. When I say hundreds of monkeys, I am not pulling your leg. They literally are everywhere. Scary at first, especially if you happen to have a backpack or anything that remotely resembles like something edible, but after a while they leave you alone.

Good news though, Thailand has gas bottles with a system that fits perfectly into my Australian stove ! Finally, we can camp anywhere by any weather, and cook ourselves a nice dinner. Did I mention I have lost six kilos since June? Yep, six kilos. I know I wasn’t, well, large or anything, but I look like I joined a hunger strike. There are a few possible reasons, some are perfectly reasonable, but having to rely on wood fire every day after a long drive, might explain why I skipped a meal or two in Indonesia. Claire specifically gave strict instructions to Julie for the next three months: stuff him! Stuff him with nuts, cream, rice, pasta, wheat, dried fruits, anything that will make him put on weight.

So, now we have gas, now we can cook a proper meal. And that’s exactly what we did that night. And the two after that. Khao Yai National Park is the largest national park in Thailand; it is home to many endangered species, best of which is the elephant, which Julie was very keen on spotting. Sadly though, despite our numerous attempts, day and night, we saw none. Not a single elephant. We did see a lot of deer, and twice a couple of big porcupines came right up to our tent. We did meet a weirdo who got arrested the same night, a German animal-photographer, and a loud Chinaman who insisted on playing the kind of jazz you hear in elevators, or shopping malls, at 6:00AM every morning, but no elephant.

And we understood one more thing about Thailand’s national parks: not one track is properly signed, so you do tend to get lost after just 1km. Only, getting lost in the bush in Australia is one thing, getting lost in a thick jungle in Thailand in monsoon is another. Granted, there are no crocodile, deadly spider, deadly snake, deadly fly or deadly just about anything for that matter, like in Australia, except maybe if you’re lucky, a tiger or a bear; but there is the worst kind of animal on the planet, the sleaziest, slimiest, dirtiest and actually hardest to kill: the leech.

Leeches are creatures from the underworld, ramping and moving forward like a poking finger, trying to find what they’ve just smelled: you! And once they found you, that’s it, you’re done for. No point screaming or running, it’s still crawling up your shoelace, your pants, your sock, until it gets a nice comfy spot on your bare skin, and then it sinks its teeth in. Quite surprisingly, it has two mouths, on either end of its hideous body, don’t ask me where its arse is though. Then it sucks, it sucks your blood until it’s gorged with it, growing from its hair size original form to a thick two inches poach of blood, mine in this case, and it closes the wound and crawls to a dark spot to digest. Yuck.

There are thousands of these horrible things. Killing them was not easy either; death by fire was usually the sentence, though being torn apart or squashed was reported.
I can gladly report though, that despite the lack of comfort, the constant humidity, the mud everywhere and the leeches, my little sister is coping very well with all this. In fact she’s quite good at this. And she’s getting better every day at reading a map too.

So after three days of a lot of failed attempts to bushwalk (due to bad signage, not laziness), mud (so much mud), rain and leeches, and bad jazz, we left camp and drove down the valley, heading North to Nakhon Ratchasima.

The hotel was average but the HP Repair Centre was very good, or at least I thought they were when they told me they’d fix my laptop, until I realised they didn’t. Once again, a “yes we can” situation that ended badly but it’s okay, I’m still learning Thai.

After Chayapum, heading North still, we set up camp in a promising location, Tatton National Park which supposedly had quite nice bushwalks, only to find out they were closed due to rain season, and even if they hadn’t been, the map we were given was in Thai, and badly printed. Still, we enjoyed the waterfall a lot more than the three drunk teenage girls who sang and played the guitar all night. The next day we were alone in the park and slept soundly for hours.

Yet another park for us to spend two nights was Phu Ruea, just off the Lao border on the North side of the country. Here the temperature drops at night, and in the morning fog swallows the whole mountain. I felt like putting on my ski shoes and going for a run. We were given a basic map but the Lonely Planet said this time the signage on the bushwalk tracks was actually rather good.

Unfortunately, we chose the longest walk available, so I guess not many people do get to see how poorly the signage actually is. We got lost pretty soon, and it took us five hours to find our camp again. Or maybe we just suck at navigation, but I’m pretty sure the map was absolute shite. The trail we were on disappeared more than once, and our water and supplies shortened rapidly, so eventually we turned around.

Awesome thunderstorm that night, thank god we put the tent under a kiosk, poor neighbours didn’t get that chance.
North Thailand is really absolutely beautiful. Hills, mountains even, green fields, rivers, cooler temperatures, dramatic sceneries, rice plantations, small villages, everything is there. Of course, cool temperatures and hills mean only one thing: wine. There are apparently a few wineries in the area, one of which was on our way so, obviously, we stopped for a tasting. Sadly though, only the white was available to taste, so we never knew what the Shiraz was like. But seriously, after so many weeks on the road, just any wine would have been good. Surprisingly though, the wine was actually good. A bit too sweet for me, but Julie liked it so much we bought a bottle, this would go great before dinner, we thought.

A scenic drive took us along the Mekong river to Sangkhom, where we spent the night in a bamboo bungalow, overlooking the river, then to Nonghkai. If it hadn’t been for a flat tyre, it would have been a perfect three days drive. Nevertheless, we reached town early in the afternoon, booked in a guesthouse full of Aussies, and strolled the market streets for lunch. Nongkhai is a very “backpacker” town, just on the Lao border. Many expats live here, many more drive through on their way to or from the neighbouring country. And the architecture of the small houses on the river is just brilliant. We loved it.

Anyways, we said we’d go to Cambodia first so it was time to drive South, through Ban Kok first, the self-appointed “King Cobra Village of Thailand”, to witness a display of either stupidity or bravery: three men let a bunch of cobras loose on the stage and try to see if their quicker than the snakes. A small child got bitten, but it was just a python and he was part of the show anyways. Further South, Khon Kaen, with one of the best street food we had in a month, then a few silk and silvery villages just North of Surin, our last stop before Cambodia.

This town will conclude our Thai chapter, for now anyways because we’ll be back after Laos, in Chang Mai, around the end of November.

I will say about Thailand that I loved the country, but the language barrier is such that I feel terribly frustrated with the Thai people, and myself, for not being able to communicate more, and understand their culture a bit more. What I understood was a lot of “yes we can” when I am sure there is a lot more to know. I can honestly say also that Thailand has perhaps understood tourism a little too much, and makes the tourism industry a little too noticed. Everything is for sale, or for rent. Or has price at least. This perhaps lacks authenticity. Or maybe it’s just me, and the kind of tourism I look for, and can’t find here. (And on that note, perhaps I owe Malaysia an apology, I was perhaps expecting too much, or something else at least, from Malaysia. My bad, next country, no expectations, none).

Thailand is truly amazing, colourful, fascinating, rich, yet very kitsch with their temples and statues of Buddha, or a giraffe, or Snow White, but oh so warm. When you meet a Thai, he or she will probably bow, join their hand to their head and salute you. But that’s the polite way to greet someone, so you’re probably in a shop or in a restaurant when that happens. When you’re on the road, it’s something else. Their face is of stone, their eyes are blank, and the whole face is empty of emotion, nothing goes through. Then you acknowledge them, by either a small smile or a raise of the eyebrows. And there, something magical happens, the person in front of you comes alive, their whole face lights up like a Xsmas tree, with the biggest smile ever. One second there is nothing, no emotion, the next there’s the largest grin you’ll ever see, and there’s nothing else to do but return that smile.

I would love to understand a bit more this fascinating culture, through first this difficult language, but I don’t have enough time. Too bad. I will come back then, for sure. Just for the smiles if nothing else.

Tomorrow, we’re in Cambodia.

Distance to-day: 2203km, total: 35962km.