Tanami’s in da houz

It took a lot longer than expected, and a lot more money than planned, but finally, Troopy is parked outside, home and hosed.

So what happened ? Well, the guys in Thailand had one job : clean the car for quarantine inspection. Well they botched it. As a result, the first inspection was a disaster, and the AQIS decided to strip the car and clean it thoroughly. Boy did they took their sweet time. I have the result of the company that specialises in cleaning vehicles for import, twenty three hours worth of labour. That’s how long it took, apparently so, because quite frankly I could have done the same in half a day. But let’s not argue.

The day we brought Troopy back in was a pretty special day too. Imagine this. Claire and I drive with the Nissan (aka The Troll) to Fremantle to the depot, we pack all our stuff that Claire had un-packed ten days ago, back into the car. We start the car, and I do mean the car. Single, not plural. No, not plural. Because now, the Patrol won’t start. The fuel pump decided it had enough.

One starter motor, one fuel pump, one full service, plus bits and pieces here and there. Bam, two grand.

Back home, Troopy now needs to be registered to WA. But, with all this mess with getting Troopy in Australia, I never once remembered to check when the registration was actually due. July 20th. That’s when. So when, early August, I went to the WA Transport Bureau, of course, I can’t simply transfer the registration to Western Australia, nooo that would be too simple, nooo sir you need to have a vehicle inspection.

(this is when, in the movies, the music starts to be dramatic)

Holly shit, not the Pits !

And so, of course, it failed the first time.
Gotta remove the tinting on the windows, too dark. Really ? Cos that costs a fortune in Oz, in comparison to the 40bucks I paid in Lombok.
Gotta remove the central console, Sir, it hinders the use of the handbrake. Meh, I’ll just put it back afterwards.
Gotta remove the spot lights Sir, you’re only allowed to have four in Western Australia, you have eight. (**shrug** I’ll put them back on later **evil laugh**)
Your seatbelt does not retract fast enough. I’m sorry, what ? My what does what now ? Seriously ?
There’s free play in the steering. Oooooooh ! There’s going to be free play on your face soon, little man.
And there’s a missing bump-stop in the suspension. Yes but bump-stops are for coil suspension, I have leaf suspension. Don’t care Sir, it has to be there, it’s in the manual. Ah, well, if it’s in the manual…let’s not argue with “The Manual” then shall we.
And you need a permit for the long range fuel tank.

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFAAARRRRRRRRRKKKKK !!! This is a bloody joke ! It never ends does it !

So I fast forward a little, I spare you the numerous times I almost ate my whole arm trying to negotiate with administrations, explain to numerous mechanics what to fix and no I don’t want that looked at, just do what’s on the list thank you, here’s your eighteen hundred dollars thank you very much have a nice day.

And oh yeah, another funny one. My drivers license. I have a Victorian one, now I need a Western Australian one. Yes but they can’t find me in the system, they believe my drivers license is fake, so I have to wait, and possibly pay more, while they try to track me down.

But I digress.

Last week, fiiinally, after waaay to long, waaay too much money, waaay too much swearing, I regretfully handed over my Victorian license plates. Goodbye PRV-405. Hello 1EFV245. How am I ever going to remember that ?

Well, I lied to the officer, I said I lost one license plate, I kept the other one.

What ? I’m sentimental.